Gain not base gains; base gains are the same as losses.

Money that arrives by a route you would not describe out loud costs more than it brings. Something is exchanged that does not appear in the figure: your standing with yourself, the version of events you must now maintain, the precedent that makes the next one easier. Counted properly it is a loss with a credit entry at the top. That is why the gains people regret are so often the ones that worked.

Before taking something, ask whether you would be content for the people you respect to know exactly how it came to you. If not, turn it down early, while turning it down is still cheap.