A bond that survives being seen clearly is different in kind from one that needs certain facts kept off the table. Some closeness rests on flattering pictures the two of you agree never to examine, and it holds only as long as nobody looks. The sturdier sort can take accurate information about who each of you actually is without collapsing under it.

Consider a friendship where you edit yourself, and ask what you are protecting. Sometimes it is the other person; more often it is the pleasant version of you they hold. Letting a little accuracy in is a test, and passing it is worth more than the comfort you risk.