Settling is a choice that likes to pretend it’s a compromise.

Compromise means two things were weighed and something was traded on purpose. Settling skips the weighing and keeps the language, which is what makes it hard to catch: you get the vocabulary of maturity for a decision made mostly out of tiredness. The tell is usually that you cannot say what you got in exchange.

When you hear yourself call something a compromise, name both sides of the trade out loud. If there is only one side, it is worth another look before it hardens into the way things are.