“No worries, it’s totally fine :)” has started more fights than an honest “that bugged me.”

Saying fine when it is not fine does not remove the problem, it just moves it somewhere the other person cannot see. They carry on unaware, you carry the annoyance, and it comes out three weeks later attached to something unrelated. Honest and kind are not opposites. Most people would rather hear the small true version now than the big one later.

Try one accurate sentence this week: that bugged me, or I would rather not. No speech required, just the actual thing, said without heat.