Passive-aggressive is aggressive with a lag. Just say the thing.

The sighing, the one-word replies, the joke with something underneath: all of it is the message being delivered slowly and with deniability. Indirect does not mean less aggressive, it means harder to answer, which is most of the appeal. The other person now has to guess what they did, and guessing makes people defensive rather than sorry. Nothing gets resolved because nothing was actually said.

If you are doing it, name the thing plainly and accept a short uncomfortable conversation. If somebody is doing it to you, ask once, directly, what is going on. Both are quicker than three days of atmosphere.