Every assumption you make is a sentence you wrote for someone else without asking them.
REFLECTION
WHAT THIS MEANS
An assumption is a line you put in someone’s mouth and then respond to as though they said it. You end up in a conversation with a character you built, complete with motives they never mentioned, while the real person wonders why you are annoyed. Most misunderstandings run on this quietly. An invented sentence feels exactly like a remembered one.
Notice when you are certain about why someone did something. Then ask them, in the plainest form available: what was going on there. You will be wrong often enough to make asking a habit.
A QUESTION TO SIT WITH
What did you assume about someone before asking them anything?
MORE IN PERCEPTION & ATTENTION
- Swap “why would you do that” for “what happened?” and watch the other person stop bracing for impact.
- A throwaway joke in a group of ten becomes a story told ten times. Be careful what you drop in crowds.
- There’s an unsend button for messages but not for the look on someone’s face after you said it.
Free, with nothing to buy inside it.