Insults usually tell you more about the sender’s fears than the target’s flaws. Read them like a diary entry.

An insult is assembled from whatever the sender is carrying. People reach for the wound they know best, so the accusation often describes their own fear far more accurately than it describes you. That does not make it pleasant to receive, and you are not obliged to treat cruelty as an interesting document. It does change what the words are evidence of.

When something lands hard, ask whether it is true before deciding that it is. Check it against people who know you. If it is not, set it down without a rebuttal, since the rebuttal is the part they were hoping for.