Competence built out of necessity is real competence, and it tends to arrive early in a house that needs it. The trouble is that being the one who copes hardens into an identity, and then asking for anything feels like breaking the arrangement. Being capable and needing help are not in conflict, though it takes a while to believe that.

Pick one thing you have been handling alone and ask for a hand with that one thing, not with everything. A sibling, a relative, a teacher, a coach: somebody who can take a specific piece. You can go on being the reliable one without being the only one.