“Thank you for telling me” is the best response to hearing something you didn’t want to hear.

Somebody bringing you unwelcome news has usually already weighed up whether it was worth the trouble. Your first reaction decides whether they do it again, and a defence, however justified, quietly teaches them to stop. Thanking them does not concede that they are right about everything, it acknowledges the risk they took in opening their mouth. People who hear about problems early have generally made it safe to be told.

Say those words first next time, before you have formed any opinion on the content. Then take some hours and come back to the substance separately. You will start finding things out sooner.