Long-distance friends learn to hear “I’m fine” over the phone and know when it isn’t.

Distance strips out the face, so all the attention moves to the voice, and after a while you can hear what the words are denying. That is not magic. It is hours of listening to one particular person, which is why a friendship can stay real without being in the same room.

If a voice sounded off this week, say so plainly rather than waiting for them to volunteer it. You can tell them they sound tired and ask what is going on. And when you are the one insisting you are fine, consider letting them in.