Gratitude doesn’t mean you owe anyone your silence about what hurt you.

Thankfulness and honesty are separate accounts, and people sometimes try to pay one with the other. You can be genuinely glad for what somebody gave you and still say clearly that something they did caused harm. Being told to be grateful is often how a hard thing gets closed early.

If there is something you have kept quiet because saying it felt ungrateful, you are allowed to say it. Start with the person you trust most rather than the person involved, if that is easier. Keep the two separate, one sentence for what you are thankful for and one for what hurt.