Character isn’t the birthday post. It’s showing up when they move apartments.

Public affection is easy to produce and costs almost nothing, which is why it proves almost nothing. Anyone can write a paragraph about how much somebody means to them. Far fewer will give up a Saturday to carry boxes down three flights in the heat, and the person being helped can tell which they got, even if they never mention it.

Compare who you have posted about lately with who you have actually turned up for, and see whether the lists match. Then offer one hour of something boring: a lift, a move, a shift covered. The post can stay, it just cannot be the whole contribution.