When a friend is going through it, don’t rush them to “feeling better.” Being okay takes as long as it takes.
STILLNESS
WHAT THIS MEANS
Encouraging somebody to be all right faster is often about your own discomfort at watching them struggle. From the inside it can land as a request to stop talking about it, or as evidence that they are taking too long. Company with no deadline attached is what tends to help, and it is harder to offer than advice.
Sit with a friend who is having a hard time without steering them toward a brighter conclusion. Ask what today was like rather than whether things are improving. Offer something small and specific, a walk or a lift or an hour of nothing much, and let them set the pace.
A QUESTION TO SIT WITH
Who are you quietly hurrying toward being okay?
MORE IN PATIENCE & TIMING
- Apprentices spend years before they’re called masters. Nobody calls that wasted time.
- Don’t fill every silence in a conversation. Sometimes the other person is about to say the real thing.
- Your grandpa’s chisel only works sharp. Sharpening is slow, and it’s the part that makes the fast part possible.
Free, with nothing to buy inside it.