If asking for your money back feels impossible, you couldn’t afford to lend it.

The test for lending is not whether you can spare the money, it is whether you could ask for it back without dreading the conversation. If the ask feels impossible, the loan was already a gift you had not admitted to, and resentment arrives later with interest. People lose friendships over amounts they would have handed over freely. Knowing which one you are doing beforehand keeps it clean.

Next time you are asked, decide which it is before you answer. If you can only afford to give it, give it, say so, and let it go. If you need it back, say when, out loud, at the time.