A birthday cake gets eaten in ten minutes. The person who stayed up decorating it is the part you keep.

The object is the smaller half of the gesture. Whatever effort went into the cake vanishes down the table in minutes, while the knowledge that somebody was awake at eleven doing something fiddly for you is what stays, often for years. People remember having been thought about far more clearly than they remember any gift.

Notice who did the invisible work at the last celebration you were at, and thank them directly rather than in general. Then do a piece of that work yourself for somebody. Effort nobody was obliged to make is the part that registers.