Every family has one person who knows how everyone’s related. Someday that job goes to somebody. Start paying attention.

The person who can explain how everyone is connected is holding information that exists nowhere else. It is not written down, and it transfers by accident if it transfers at all, usually when it is already too late to ask follow-up questions. The job is open to whoever gets curious first. There is no appointment and no ceremony.

At the next gathering, sit next to whoever knows and ask them to walk you through one branch. Write names, dates and towns in your notes app while they talk. Ten minutes a year is enough to become the person who knows.