If you could hand someone your phone without panicking, you’re living pretty honestly.

The flinch is the information, not the contents. Most people would not want anyone scrolling freely through their messages, and that is ordinary privacy rather than guilt, but there is a difference between not wanting to be read and specifically hoping one person never sees one thread. The second kind of worry is pointing at something.

Notice whether anything in particular comes to mind when you imagine handing it over. If one thing does, that is the thing, and you probably already know what to do about it.