Two honest accounts can differ because attention is partial. Each person noticed what affected them, remembers the moment they were hurt, and heard a tone the other did not know they used. Neither is lying and neither has the whole thing. That is why deciding who is right before you have heard both halves usually produces a confident wrong answer.

When friends bring you opposite versions, hold the verdict and ask each what the other would say. If you are in the fight yourself, ask for their account before you give yours. You can still conclude someone was out of line, once you have the parts you were missing.