If the destination requires becoming someone you despise, reconsider the route.

The route shapes who arrives. If getting somewhere requires years of behaving in a way you find contemptible, the person standing at the destination will be someone who does that, and no amount of intending to change afterwards reliably undoes it. Character is built by repetition, not by resolution.

Look at what this path is asking of you regularly, not occasionally. If those habits describe someone you would not want to become, start looking for a different route to the same place. There is usually more than one.