Do not measure another person’s love by the way they behave in public after a loss.

Grief has no standard expression, and the public version is the least reliable part of it. Some people weep at the service; others organize the food, tell jokes, or seem strangely fine, and none of that reports on how much they loved the person. What you are watching is a temperament under pressure, plus whatever coping was available that morning.

If someone’s response looks odd to you, assume there is a version you cannot see. Keep checking on the ones who seemed to be handling it well. And if you are the one being watched, know that no particular way of grieving is owed to anybody.