A good question can be direct without being rude.

Directness and rudeness get confused because both remove padding. What makes a question rude is not its clarity but its purpose: whether it is asked to understand or to corner someone. A plain question asked with genuine interest is usually a relief, because the other person no longer has to guess what you want.

Ask the real question instead of circling it, and ask it in as few words as you can. Then let a pause sit there without filling it. If the subject is delicate, say why you are asking, which turns a bare question into an offer the person can decline.