Ask for the missing fact before making the missing fact into a story.

A gap in information does not sit there empty. Within a day or two the mind has filled it with a plausible narrative, usually one where somebody meant something by the silence, and after a week that narrative has the texture of a fact you remember rather than a guess you made. From then on you are reacting to your own invention.

When you notice you are explaining someone’s behavior to yourself, ask them the plain question instead. Keep it short, without the theory you have built. Most of the time the answer is duller than the story, which is exactly the relief you were looking for.