Inherited comfort can make effort feel more independent than it really was.

Effort is always real, and it is also always supported by something. A person who worked hard from a steady base did work hard; what is easy to lose sight of is the base, because it never announced itself. No bill arrived for the house you could return to, the fees somebody else paid, the emergency that was absorbed before it reached you.

Try listing what was in place before you started, without treating it as a debt or a charge against you. Then, where you can, be part of somebody else’s quiet base rather than only an example to them.