Meaning is created between the speaker’s intention and the listener’s interpretation.

What you meant does not determine what was communicated. Meaning is assembled from your intention and their interpretation together, and you only control one of those inputs. Insisting on your intention when something has landed badly ignores half the process.

When a message goes wrong, take responsibility for your half without insisting on it as a defence. Ask how it landed and what they took from it. Then clarify. Saying that is not what I meant is a starting point, not a conclusion, and the useful conversation happens after it.