The best receipt—best to work and best to take—is the admonition of a friend.

A warning from someone who likes you does more than any other correction. From a stranger the same words are an attack; from a friend they come with the evidence of goodwill already attached, so you can hear the content instead of defending against the tone. This is why the friend willing to say the awkward thing is rare and valuable. Most people who like you will let you continue.

Think of who last told you something you did not want to hear, and thank them, plainly. Then do the other half: say the difficult thing to someone you care about, once, kindly, and then leave it with them.