They come to see; they come that they themselves may be seen.

Half the reason anyone turns up is to be looked at. That is ordinary rather than shameful, and pretending otherwise makes people harder to read instead of better. Once you allow for the double motive, gatherings make more sense, since the room is full of people watching and hoping to be watched at the same time.

Before the next event, name your own reason honestly. If you are going to be seen, admit it and enjoy it. If you are going to see someone in particular, find them early and give them the attention you were hoping to receive.