Men are disturbed not by things, but by the view which they take of them.

A delayed reply can read as rejection or as a busy afternoon; a mistake can read as proof of incompetence or as an ordinary part of learning. The facts are identical in each pair, and the distress comes from which reading you settle on. That is a hopeful discovery, because readings can be examined in a way that events cannot. Some things are painful whatever view you take, though, and loss or injustice does not become fine because you look at it differently.

When something disturbs you, write the facts in one column and your interpretation in another. Ask whether another reasonable reading exists, and notice whether your feelings shift as you consider it.