Sometimes loving yourself means refusing yourself something destructive.

Kindness toward yourself is not the same as giving yourself whatever you want. Some of the things you crave will make tomorrow harder, and handing them over is not warmth, it is neglect dressed as indulgence. Real care sometimes looks like the refusal a good friend would give you, delivered without contempt but without wavering either.

Think about which of your comforts consistently leaves you worse off afterwards. You do not need to strip it away with force. Try declining it once, on purpose, and paying attention to how the evening actually goes. The choice becomes much easier when you have evidence rather than theory.