Anger and jealousy can no more bear to lose sight of their objects than love.

Resentment keeps you attached to whoever caused it, as firmly as affection would. The mind returns to the person, rehearses the scene, checks up on them, and calls all of that justice rather than attachment. Someone you cannot stop thinking about still holds a great deal of your life.

If you want to be free of somebody, the measure is not how strongly you feel but how often they come to mind. Notice how many of your inner conversations are with a person you claim to have finished with. Reducing the frequency achieves more than winning the argument ever would.