Children begin by loving their parents; after a time they judge them; rarely, if ever, do they forgive them.

Love comes first because a small child has no vantage point from which to see a parent whole. Judgment arrives later, with the information and the comparisons, and it feels like clear sight. The third movement, the one where you allow that they were a person who was also being shaped by something, is the one most people never make. It is not owed, and it is harder than either of the first two.

You are not required to forgive anything that hurt you. But if the ledger is one you would rather put down, try holding one fact about them you only learned as an adult.