My life has been full of terrible misfortunes most of which never happened.

Fear does most of its work in advance. You live through the illness, the argument, the collapse in full detail, your body responds as though it were happening, and then most of it never arrives. The suffering was real even though the event was not, which is what makes it so hard to argue with.

When you notice yourself rehearsing a disaster, try naming it out loud as a rehearsal. Then ask what you would actually do if it came, answer once, and leave it there. Preparing takes a few minutes, while dreading can take years.