Working hard on yourself and being hard on yourself are two different jobs. Only one pays.

Working on yourself is effort pointed at the next attempt. Being hard on yourself is effort pointed at the last one, and it mostly produces a feeling rather than a change. The second is easy to mistake for seriousness, because it hurts and hurting feels like it should count. It does not, and it usually leaves you with less to work with tomorrow.

When you catch yourself running the highlight reel of your own mistakes, ask what the next version would need. Turn the sentence from a verdict into an instruction. Same energy, completely different result.