Losing them hurt. Losing yourself to keep them would’ve hurt a lot longer.

Some relationships ask you to get smaller to keep them running. You edit opinions, drop people, stop mentioning what you want, and it works for a while because the cost is paid so slowly. Losing the person is a sharp pain with an end to it. Losing the version of you that existed before is slower and much harder to reverse.

If you are in the middle of that loss right now, be patient with how long it takes. And when you are ready, notice what came back once you stopped editing yourself. That return is not a consolation prize.