Family fights are loud, but they’re not the whole story. Pay attention to who shows up when things go wrong.

Volume is a poor measure of what a family is. Arguments are loud and memorable and take up most of the recording, while the quieter evidence, who drives you when you are stuck, who stays up, who handles the difficult phone call, barely registers. Both are real, and only one of them predicts what people do when it counts.

Watch for the showing up rather than the shouting. If home is unsafe rather than just loud, that is a different situation, and telling an adult you trust is the right move.