Beat your old reaction.

Reactions feel involuntary, and in the moment they are. Over time they are also trainable, mostly by noticing them afterwards and imagining a slightly better version. The gap between old reaction and new one is small at first and widens with attention.

Think of a reaction you are not proud of, the flare of defensiveness or the immediate no. Decide now what you would rather do. You will still react the old way sometimes. Sometimes you will not, and that is the whole progress.