Group chats have a hundred messages a day and somehow nobody ever says the important thing.

Volume is not contact. A chat rewards whatever is fast and funny and cheap to send, and the important sentence is none of those, because it needs a beat of quiet in front of it and a group chat never has one. So the real thing waits, and everyone assumes somebody else will say it.

Say it one to one instead. A voice note, a walk home, the corner of a kitchen at a party. The message you keep almost typing into a group of eleven is nearly always meant for one of them.