You can’t manage other people’s feelings for them. That’s their homework, not yours.

Caring about someone and being in charge of how they feel are two different jobs, and only one of them is possible. You can be kind, honest, and around; you cannot do the part that happens inside them. Trying anyway usually turns into shrinking yourself so nobody has to feel anything.

Notice where you are editing your own choices to prevent a reaction. Say the true thing kindly, then let them have their response without rushing to fix it. You are allowed to be a person somebody is briefly annoyed with.