That wave of relief when plans get canceled is information. Pay attention to it.

Relief is honest in a way that planning is not. When you said yes, you were imagining a future version of yourself with more energy, and the cancellation shows you what the present one actually wanted. It does not mean those people were wrong or that you should stop going out. It means something about that particular arrangement was not for you.

Keep a loose count for a month of which cancellations land as gifts. If the same name or the same kind of evening keeps showing up, adjust instead of enduring.