You don’t have to be an open book. A little mystery means people have to actually get to know you.

Handing someone your whole story in the first week saves them the work of noticing you. It also flattens you into a summary, and summaries get filed away and stop being updated. Holding some things back is not a game you are playing on people. It leaves room for someone to build an impression out of what you do rather than what you announced.

In the next conversation with someone new, answer one question with less detail than usual and let the pause sit. Ask them something instead. See how much more you learn when you are not busy explaining yourself.