Ask your best friend to describe you in three words. Then ask them to be honest.

Their first answer will be kind, because that is what friends do on the spot. The second answer is the one you are after, and it takes a direct request, since nobody hands over the unflattering word unless you make it safe. What comes back is not the truth about you. It is one view from someone who has watched a lot of your ordinary days.

Ask someone who has known you a while, and then ask again for the version they would not normally say. Do not respond to it beyond thank you. Sit with the third word for a few days before deciding whether it deserves anything.