Laugh your real laugh, the loud weird one. The people who love it are the ones worth keeping.

Editing yourself down to a socially safe version is exhausting, and it works in the sense that fewer people react. It also means nobody is responding to you, only to the managed edition, so any approval you collect belongs to someone else. The loud strange laugh is a small, fast test of who is actually there.

Let it out unmanaged for a week and pay attention to who leans in and who stiffens. Both reactions are useful. Spend more of your time with the first group, since being liked while performing is a poor substitute for being liked while present.