A lesson delivered with humiliation often teaches fear alongside the information.

GRATITUDE

WHAT THIS MEANS

Shame is a powerful teacher of avoidance and a poor teacher of anything else. When a correction arrives with humiliation attached, the person learns the information and also learns to fear the situation, the subject, and often the person delivering it. Years later the fact may be gone and the flinch remains, which is a strange thing to have installed in someone.

When you correct someone, separate the error from the person deliberately and say the useful part plainly. Check afterwards whether they seem more willing to ask you things or less. That is the honest measure.

A QUESTION TO SIT WITH

What did you learn well but still associate with shame?

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