If you argue to win, you leave with the same brain. If you argue to learn, you leave upgraded.

The aim you bring to a disagreement decides what you can get out of it. If the aim is winning, every piece of new information becomes a threat to be neutralised, so you defend the position you walked in with and leave carrying exactly that. If the aim is understanding, the other person’s best point becomes the most valuable thing in the room.

Decide which one you are doing before you open your mouth. Try saying that you had not thought of that, out loud, once. It costs almost nothing and changes the character of what follows.