Being wronged does not automatically make every response righteous.

Having been treated badly gives you a genuine claim and does not hand you a blank cheque. The sense of righteousness that comes with being wronged is powerful precisely because it silences the usual questions about proportion and collateral damage. People do things from that position they would never do otherwise, and afterward the original injury does not cover it.

When you are acting from a real grievance, keep asking the same questions you would ask on an ordinary day. Is this proportionate, who else is affected, would I defend this in a year. The wrong done to you remains real regardless of the answers.