Holidays with relatives can be warm and still end at 9 p.m. Loving them and leaving on time aren’t opposites.

An evening with family often gets treated as a test of devotion measured in hours, so leaving early reads as a verdict on everybody. Affection and endurance are different things, and stretching one until it turns into the other is what sours a good night. The last hour rarely adds anything worth staying for.

Decide when you are leaving before you arrive, and mention it lightly on the way in. Be fully present until then instead of watching the clock. Warm and finite is a better gift than long and depleted.