Ask “why am I like this?” and your brain writes a roast. Ask “what would help?” and it writes a plan.

The question you ask determines the kind of answer you get. One invites a list of your faults, which your mind is well stocked to produce, and that list has never once changed anything. The other asks for options, and the same mind will produce those too if that is what you request.

Catch the first question as it starts and swap it deliberately. Ask what would help right now, and then what would help tomorrow. This is not positive thinking, it is pointing a very capable machine at a question that has a usable answer.