The quality of your life tracks the quality of the questions you ask yourself on a quiet night.

The questions you ask yourself set the range of answers you can get back. Ask why you always ruin things and you will get a list, ask what you actually want from this year and you get something you can work with. Most people never notice they are asking, because the questions run underneath everything as a habit.

Catch one of your standing questions tonight and write it down exactly as your head phrases it. See whether it is a question or an accusation in question form. Then write a better one and use that instead for a week.