If every day feels like a tryout, you’re not in a relationship. You’re on a roster that keeps getting cut.

Security is the point of a close relationship, not the reward at the end of one. If you are performing continuously, monitoring your standing, adjusting to avoid being dropped, then what you are in runs on evaluation rather than commitment. That state is exhausting in a way that is hard to see from inside, because the effort feels like love.

Ask whether you can be ordinary around this person without consequences. Notice how you feel in the hour after seeing them, which is often more honest than how you feel during. If the answer keeps coming back the same, that is information you are allowed to act on.