Getting through a loss doesn’t mean forgetting it. It means carrying it without letting it steer.

Moving on is not deletion. The loss stays, and it probably should, because it was real and it taught you something. The question is whether it rides along or takes the wheel, whether it informs your choices or makes them. Pain in the driver’s seat narrows what you are willing to try next, usually without announcing why.

When you notice yourself avoiding something, ask whether you are avoiding it on the evidence or because of an old loss. If it is the loss, do the smallest version of the avoided thing anyway. The memory can come with you, it just does not get a vote.