Some people want to be famous. Aim to be the name that makes a room relax.

There is a kind of standing that has nothing to do with being widely known. Some people’s arrival lowers the tension in a room, because everyone there has learned they will not be humiliated, cornered, or turned into an audience while that person is present. It gets built out of years of small restraint and nobody announces it. It is also considerably rarer than fame.

You can start on it immediately, since it is made of behaviour rather than achievement. Stop telling the story that embarrasses somebody. Let the quieter person finish, and be the same with everyone in the room regardless of who is watching.